122. Why me?

What makes me write this blog? A rhetorical question – no answers required on the back of a beer mat.

Why am I sitting here at silly o’clock thinking; oh I know what I’ll do I’ll tell the ‘world’. Well half a dozen people possibly, how crubbish I feel?

When I started this blog …. please don’t glaze over – crickey I’m turning into someone who harks back the whole time ‘I remember the time …’ So I will attempt to stop doing that. In fact, kidz, whenever you think I might use that phrase please shout ‘Oh no you don’t missy’ …sorry getting confused with panto.

ho hum it will be a sad day when I have lost the ability to waffle.

Okay so to ‘now’, right this second. Sitting typing in pain with – drum roll – the new chronic condition which is Crohns. Flipperty flop this is truely rubbish.

So eating with Parkinson’s is complicated. The problem is the tablets take the long route to the brain – the scenic one, which avoids motorways – via the stomach.

I swallow the tablets with water. They go into the stomach and have to find their way to the brain without losing their power. Their route is hampered by challenges each trying to weaken them; think ‘amusing gameshow’, with the tablets being hit by pieces of fillet steak whilst trying to climb up a tree from the stomach to the brain. (Protein, if eaten near taking my tablets, will interfere with the absorption of my PD meds, meaning when/if they reach the brain they won’t be as affective).

Then throw in another chronic condition – Crohns – involving food. So this is a gameshow with knobs on. The PD tablets arriving in a stomach which is also inflamed with Crohns inflammation due to a reaction to some foods.

Then add the excitement of ‘The Unknown’, which is always a good one. PD is full of unknowns, but so is Crohns.

I do know that different foods/drinks kick off Crohns. But I don’t know which ones. And everyone is different.

Now I must bear in mind that this blog is not Crohniality, so I shan’t go on about it. But to be honest I don’t know much about it at the moment. I have started to work out a few foods which I seem to be able to eat and many I can’t, through trial and error, I am now gluten and dairy free which has made a huge impact on controlling the Crohns symptoms. BUT there is a lot more to work out.

Crohns and Parkinson’s can kick off at any time and anywhere without warning … and sometimes combine their efforts.

At silly o’clock in the morning. Life is really not great when my Crohns kicks off and my constitution and digestive system becomes painful and sporadic. And at the same time the Parkinson’s medication doesn’t absorb properly and moving and walking is really difficult,

But on the flip side Life can be really great; when I am in the pub taking part in the quiz and the world is aligned and the Crohns and PD are asleep under the table.

Of course these two scenarios are as likely to be swapped, ie rubbish in the quiz with all my symptoms kicking off, and then feeling tip top (and knowing the answer to question 12) at silly o’clock in the morning.

All this twaddle makes me appreciate the good moments. I mean really appreciate them. Hence the slight madness in my eyes on the dance floor when I can suddenly move and I strut my funky stuff.

So I go back to my question Why am I writing this blog? Well certainly as a journal for me. But to help others? Not sure anymore.

When I started this blog … ‘Oh no You don’t missy’ … sorry.

This blog is still about awareness, about how you can still muddle along. How on a day when people say ‘ you look great’ you can still feel rubbish inside, or when people say ‘are you okay?’, and actually you feel tip top inside.

So; Why am I sitting here at silly o’clock thinking; oh I know what I’ll do I’ll tell the ‘world’. Well half a dozen people possibly, how crubbish I feel? I know that a real mixture of people read this blog, and many are family and friends. What I don’t want to do is worry people, but as ‘they’ say in a well known quiz … ‘I have begun so I must continue’ – it would be wrong of me just to write about the five good years with PD, with my slightly mad sense of humour and interesting top tips. It is a roller coaster …